Finding the Joy and Surviving the Holiday Stress
I recently watched the trailer for upcoming holiday movie Oh.What.Fun, starring Michelle Pfeiffer, as a grandmother determined to create the “perfect” holiday for her family. But with all the pressure, stress, and sky‑high expectations, she does what many of us secretly imagine…she walks away and escapes the weight of holiday responsibilities altogether.
Because here's the honest truth: the holiday season is often a marathon of extra to-do lists, juggling emotions, family gatherings, school events, and, of course, a big financial squeeze. This year, let's press pause on the expectations of perfection and focus on what truly matters; making it through the holidays with your well-being intact and actually enjoying the moments along the way.
Where is the Pressure REALLY Coming From?
With the holidays comes expectations, starting with so many thoughts running through my head; “will my kids be happy with what is under the Christmas tree?”, “when am I going to get the baking in?”, “did I forget to send anyone a card?”, and on and on. While these are common thoughts for many parents, the way they sneak up on us is different. For me, I’m in my car, innocently turning the radio on, and BAM! Holiday music here, there, and everywhere! For many people, it’s joyful to hear all of those tunes, but for me, it is the beginning of the increased pressures of the holiday.
Now, it would be easy to focus on and completely blame outside sources for the holiday whirlwind in our minds, but really, a good portion of this pressure is self induced!
As a parent, a lot of the pressure comes from the not-so-uncommon need to please others. While this comes from a well meaning place, you deserve to feel good during this season, too! So,where can we take the pressure off to find a better balance and actually enjoy this time?
Practical Steps for Your Parental Wellness by Taking the Pressure Off
Mindful Prioritization: It’s Okay to Say "No." Your calendar doesn't have to be packed solid. Look at every invitation and commitment and ask yourself: “Does this truly bring joy or is it absolutely unnecessary?” Politely stepping back from events that will drain your battery, budget, or patience is an act of self-care.
Balancing the Wallet. The urge to create that "perfect experience" for your family often translates into serious financial pressure. Searching for that perfect toy, hosting elaborate dinners, or traveling long-distance can turn December into a budgeting headache that lingers into the New Year. Remember, joy doesn't come with a price tag.
Create "White Space" on the Calendar. Amidst the rush, intentionally block out time for nothing at all. This unscheduled "white space" is crucial for low-stress, spontaneous family moments. Maybe it's a cozy movie, an afternoon of baking, or just sitting together by the fire. This space is often where the most genuine, unforced holiday connections are made and protecting your family’s quiet time is a must.
Share the Mental Load. The mental checklist for the holidays can often fall too heavily on one person. Sit down with your partner or family and list every single task: gift-buying, card-sending, event attendance, meal-planning, travel details, etc. Divide the list clearly and commit to doing your part. Shared responsibility means shared enjoyment!