Supporting Children Through Back-to-School Stress
The first month of back-to-school often brings excitement, but it can also be a time of heightened stress for children. Shifts in routine, new environments, and social pressures can all play a role. Here you will find insight into how you, as a parent, can recognize signs of stress, distinguish between normal jitters & deeper concerns, and provide effective support strategies.
Common Signs of Stress in Children
Children don’t always have the words to explain what they’re feeling, so stress often shows up in behaviour and physical changes. Parents may notice:
Sleep disruptions: trouble falling asleep, frequent waking, or waking unusually early.
Appetite changes: eating far less or more than usual/being pickier about foods.
Mood shifts: withdrawing, becoming unusually quiet, or showing more irritability, frustration, anger.
Emotional outbursts: meltdowns or tantrums that are stronger or more frequent than usual.
Physical complaints: stomachaches, headaches, or other ailments with no clear medical cause.
Worry and overthinking: children voicing frequent “what if” concerns about school, friends, or performance.
Occasional worries and moodiness are typical, but when these signs are persistent or interfere with daily functioning, they may signal something more than nerves caused by a new school year.
Normal Jitters vs. When to Seek Support
Feeling nervous the first month of the school year is normal; these jitters typically fade as routines settle in.
Parents can ask themselves: Does this reaction make sense for what’s happening? If a child has a few restless nights or seems extra clingy, that’s expected. However, support may be needed when:
Stress remains high past the first month
A child refuses or avoids school altogether
Emotional outbursts or worries seem to be happening more often
Daily life is disrupted, for example, when a child won’t engage in activities they once enjoyed
Supporting a Child Who Feels Overwhelmed
When a child feels overwhelmed, the instinct as a parent is often to jump in with reassurance or quick fixes. While well-meaning, too much reassurance can sometimes make children more dependent on external comfort. Instead, a more effective approach is to validate and sit with the emotion.
At Lil’ Steps Wellness, we are all about “sitting like a pig in mud.” The idea is to be fully present with your child’s big feelings, without rushing them away.
This can look like:
Normalizing emotions: Saying things like, “Lots of kids feel nervous about going back to school. It makes sense that you’re feeling this way.”
Modeling calm: Taking slow breaths yourself and keeping a steady tone can show your child that big feelings can be managed.
Inviting expression: Asking, “What does it feel like inside your body when you’re nervous?” or “What part feels the hardest right now?”
Staying alongside them: Simply being there, listening, and even sitting quietly together communicates safety and support.
Once the emotion has been acknowledged, parents can gently shift into problem-solving: “What’s one thing we could try that might make tomorrow feel easier?” This balance of validation and collaboration helps children feel both understood and empowered.
Practical Coping Tools to Try at Home
One of the simplest and most effective tools for managing stress is breathing exercises. Breathing properly can reduce physical tension and calm the nervous system.
Here’s where “Piggy Belly Breathing” can be helpful.
Place one hand on the chest and one hand on the belly.
Take a slow breath in for four seconds, filling the belly with air.
Hold for two seconds.
Slowly breathe out for six seconds.