How to Get Through the Holidays with the Christmas Chaos

Oh… my… goodness… what? Christmas?! It’s hard to believe that another year has come and is almost gone again! We are about to enter 2022 and I feel like I haven’t even processed 2021 yet. 

The last few years do seem like a bit of a blur, and I am sure many of you are tired of hearing about the pandemic & all of its impacts. The reality is, though, that extra stress and anxiety are connected to it all, so I am hoping these tips help get you through the holidays with just a bit more ease.

When I think of the holidays, I look forward to days without plans, in pajamas with a nice BIG cup of coffee that I can sip for hours and slowly decide on what the day will look like. Here is my question to you: does it make you more stressed or less stressed when your schedule is set for the day? Would you call yourself a planner or a non-planner? Believe it or not, no matter which group you fall into, both can struggle with the difficulties of anxiety.  

We sometimes think that a person with a more anxious brain needs structure and routine to feel a sense of control and security. This is true, but it can also be true for us non-planners. Ironically, too much structure and planning can make me more anxious rather than less anxious.   

When we look at the research, routines and schedules are generally helpful for kids and teens who struggle with anxiety. Having a sense of knowing what the next step is and having the time to transition properly with a sense of control is an important process for an anxious youth's mind. This is also something that I have seen come up in my own practice with youth. 

Going into the holidays this year is a great time to look at ways to increase that sense of security for your child. My favourite, simple thing to have is a calendar that the child can check to see what is coming up in their day. It can even have a checklist or stickers to empower them to mark off a finished task. This is an especially useful habit, especially for the tasks that may cause increased anxiety, as it will positively reinforce their self-confidence.

Another important piece that I fully admit is missing for me, is keeping the basic routine of sleeping, eating generally healthy, and drinking lots of water. It is tempting to change the night-time routine and allow your child to stay up late, but for a child who struggles with anxiety, it may not be worth the ripple effect of the next day. Lack of sleep combined with too much sugar and dehydration can have quite an impact on a child. Not to say that splurging a bit and having fun isn’t important, but as with the best things in life, moderation is key.

Last, but not least, I think it is important to be realistic with our expectations of our children during the holidays. Knowing each child and how much they can manage through the noise, with visitors, extra sweets, and electronics is important to balance and have an empathetic response to when there is a meltdown. From experience, I know that the meltdown usually happens during the most inconvenient time, like waiting for that Santa pic, just as your family dinner is being served, or when running to the store to buy that appetizer you forgot for a party. Step back, take a deep breath, and remember – the holidays are busy, stressful, and they can be chaotic, but proper planning helps.

Wishing you all a FANTASTIC Holiday Season and Happy New Year ahead! 😊

Lucy