The Balancing Act: Life as a Mom and Entrepreneur
At the moment, my two-year-old (very active monkey) is having a nice bubble bath and is distracted just enough for me to write this article! And just as that sentence was being typed, my partner texted me, MasterCard called me for the fifth time today, and my dog Bo just puked up in the living room…lovely.
Does this sound familiar to you? It’s the story of my life; parenting three kids (from teen to toddler), being a partner, entrepreneur, and many other roles as well as running a business with a lot of animals, plus a farm to care for. My life, I would say, is more on the busy side of things.
I was interviewed for a podcast yesterday, with an amazing woman named Cate Friesen, who hosts and produces “Here’s How It’s Done: First Hand Stories from Enterprising Women in Manitoba”. She came to the farm, just as I was hosting some Social Work Master’s students and had finished talking to a group of young entrepreneurs that were attending a local Biz Camp including a tour of the farm. One of the questions Cate asked was, “How do you balance work and home life when running a business?”
Good question! The answer to this is a long-time-in-the-making as my other two careers were also busy and emotionally heavy. Now that I’m running a business literally in my own backyard, everything is also a bit more complicated to separate at times, I will admit.
Here’s what I think are the important questions to ask yourself as a parent/caregiver and, in turn, tips for when life gets busy or overwhelming:
How do I set boundaries? Do I struggle with setting boundaries? The first thing to do is to look at the areas in your life where you need to set boundaries.Do you feel like you just have too much on your plate? Are there “toxic” people in your life that you need to set boundaries with, or are you just not getting what you give in that relationship?
Am I able to say No? In general, I struggle with saying No. I am working on it, as the empath in me has an exceedingly difficult time saying No. I have learned, sometimes the hard way, that saying No to things that do not fit your morals, values, or just don’t sit right in your gut is SO important to master. This ability to say No allows you to be a better parent, employer, counsellor, and better person overall.
Is it difficult to ask for help? Yep… this is a hard one when I have valued being a strong and independent woman throughout my life, but I have learned that it actually feels good for the people who love you to be able to help you.
Do you have scheduled Me-time during the day? As a parent and someone who is an innate people-pleaser, this one is hard for me. I admired my mom for being a giving person, someone who would give the shirt off of her back for anyone. A fantastic quality to have, but I need to make sure that I am not walking around without a shirt… that would not go over well with farm guests. Make sure you are dressing and taking care of yourself first.
What is my perspective of stress? In my last blog, I talked about the importance of how we view stress, and if we can perceive stress as something that can help and motivate us. It can be an incredibly positive thing to put into motion in our lives. If we see stress as a negative thing, then undergoing chronic stress can cause a lot of harm for us physically, emotionally, and mentally.
What can I shut off/out in my day for just a bit? We have access to communication through so many different devices that we’ve had to learn to compartmentalize so we can focus and check things off our To-Do list(s). Minimizing the ‘noise’ around you can help you stay on task. Train yourself to shut off the phone for short periods of time throughout the day, or go to a quiet place to get away from the distractions (if you can); whatever you need to do to slow down, even for a few minutes at a time, do it!
I hope this helps you create some healthier habits in your life. Remember that YOU need to come first in order to create the space for your child to grow, feel secure, and learn how to create balance in their lives as they grow into healthy adults.
Oh, remember to keep your shirt on!