Finding Strength In Vulnerability: Why Being Vulnerable is Necessary

Looking back over 2024 and considering my goals & aspirations for 2025, I can’t help but realize…last year was hard! There were many incredible memories made and great moments experienced, but, along with those, challenges and obstacles that kept me on my toes.

So, what was it that helped me through these challenges? It happens to be the thing that I shy away from the most: vulnerability.

As borrowed from calm.com: “Vulnerability happens when you're honest and transparent with your feelings, thoughts, and experiences by sharing personal stories, or admitting mistakes, and this emotional exposure can come with a degree of uncertainty. That's because being vulnerable invites others to see you as you truly are.”

For most people, including myself, vulnerability is something that makes us feel uncomfortable, weak, and exposed. We are naturally designed to survive with an instinct to keep ourselves safe and vulnerability allows pain to enter. 

So how can we work with our own pain to come out stronger on the other side?

Dealing With Clichés

Through many tough times, I’ve heard comments like, “these things happen for a reason” or “this was meant to be”. These clichés, while shared in what was meant to be a supporting way, did the exact opposite of what the intention was. 

With full transparency, this was especially true when I miscarried during my first pregnancy. I remember thinking, “really? This was meant to be and there was a reason for this?!” Someone even said, “maybe you were just not ready”; I struggled with that one for a long time.

I was then given a book called “Why Bad Things Happen to Good People”. Reading it helped me realize that sometimes things just happen in life, without any rhyme, reason, or understanding to be found. With time, we eventually find reason, creating significance or
purpose for these moments. This allows us to take back control and grow from there.

Do As I Say, Not As I Do!

Truth be told, I have a hard time admitting to people that I am struggling, and asking for help is more difficult than having to walk on a board of nails! I know, I know, this should be something I’m a pro at, considering my profession as a counsellor, but it’s something I need to continue working on.

This all comes back to vulnerability! Without it, we do not have the ability to connect to others, sharing in these times together to develop deeper & more meaningful relationships. Being vulnerable and leaning into pain allows others to bear witness to it; an essential step in the process of healing. Open the door of vulnerability and allow it to make its way out…even if you have to give it a swift boot!

The Beauty of Vulnerability

As much as I have struggled with vulnerability, when I’ve given in to it, the beauty has shown itself! My deepest relationships have developed, the most beautiful moments have been created, and my greatest learning has come. 

So, with this new year upon us, I encourage you to lean into pain a bit more, open the door to allow others to support you through it, and know that there will be better, brighter days ahead.   

Cheers to embracing the beautiful moments, memories, and lessons ahead in the year to come!