Grief: A Transformative Journey
“Death ends a life, not a relationship.” - author Mitch Albom, Tuesdays with Morrie
The pain of loss is a deeply profound and personal experience. It can feel unbearable at times. Some say that it leaves us with a homesick feeling that no remedy can ease as deep love gives way to deep loss.
Grief is inevitably part of the human journey that we must all face at some time. And yet, for the most part, we still live in a death-denying society.
Facing grief head-on is like being thrown into a foreign land and left to navigate without any roadmaps. This journey often begins with shock and numbness, deeply protective and biologically innate, rendering us to function in a state of auto-pilot.
Eventually, as the numbness and shock begin to dissipate, the journey shifts from our head space to the heart space. The truth is, one does not ever “get over” their grief; rather, we learn to live and walk alongside our grief.
Be it the loss of a partner, parent, sibling, friend, child, or pet - each loss is unique and, as tempting as it is to compare our losses, the worst loss is the one you are experiencing.
It takes great courage to mourn the painful loss of a loved one, including a wide variety of difficult & intense emotions. The risk of not tending to those emotions, and our grief as a whole, is that it lies dormant within the body for years, waiting for us to acknowledge it. Avoiding it can cause it to fester and create further potential turmoil/suffering, both physically and emotionally, as it sinks deeply into the body of some future dis-ease, waiting.
Grief may be the most unwelcome and uninvited teacher, the teacher we wish to never meet. Eventually, though, grief becomes one of the most profoundly transformative experiences of our lives, providing us with an incredibly rich opportunity for personal growth.
There is no right or wrong way to grieve - only healthier ways. Discovering ways to be with our grief can include:
Talking about your loss with someone you trust
Journalling
Creating rituals of remembrance
Learning to nurture yourself along the way with self-care
Connecting with a therapist or counsellor
Joining a grief support group
